How To Decide What To Watch On TV

How many times do you sit in the front of the TV, just flipping up and down like an indecisive zombie? It’s a constant struggle; there’s so much on TV, yet also so little. How are we supposed to decide what to watch, when our moods, and our wants, and our needs are ever-changing. If only there was a way to help us make this important decision that will stay with us for 22 or 42 minutes.

  1. Keep going higher and higher. Everyone thinks they only have a certain set of channels, but you’ll be surprised as to what you find if you just keep persevering, and continuously pressing UP on the remote control. You may come across some hidden movie channels, some quality HD programming, or perhaps some scrambled up adult channel which may get you off orally. Either way, it opens up possibilities that you didn’t think were possible, which is the cornerstone of all good TV-watching experiences.
  2. Reality shows offer a glimpse into the soul of humanity. Reality television is the oft-mocked genre that rarely garners any respect from critics and audiences alike. However, it can be argued that in your lifetime, you will see more teenage pregnancies than cameras crews documenting 8 years at a Paper Company. So is it really that crazy? On the surface, you may think you have nothing in common with either Khloe or Lamar, but if you peer a little closer, I think we all feel like a Lamar Odom’s Dad once in a while.
  3. Commercials are underrated. The last thing most people deem quality entertainment is infomercials. But the second to last thing is definitely commercials. We skip right over them, flip around when they are on, but if you just sit and watch, you’ll begin to see mini-narratives unfolding before your eyes. Watch how Flo from Progressive looks at that man, that’s a classic Will They/Won’t They. See how that Audi drives down that street, it’s a perfect getaway, but from what? All these questions will keep you on the edge of your seat, and discussing theories amongst your friends will definitely make you seem intelligent and fun to be around.
  4. There’s always Hitch. In one of President Obama’s least talked about moves after taking office, the signing of the Brennaman Bill, an act which demanded that the movie Hitch be played on some channel at all times, was met with uniform praise. Whether it be TBS, TNT, BET, a little searching will always get you there (usually in the middle of the scene where Kevin James is dancing). It’s like comfort food, so if nothing else is happening, why not get lost in Will Smith’s charm again?
Cow Tips!
*Perhaps just trying watching TV when your favorite shows are on to avoid perpetual time-wasting.
*Look up the old-fashioned word “Book” on your smart phone and see if you can get a hold of one of those relics.

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