How To Plan The Perfect Summer Getaway

With the temperatures toasty and the days longer, is there any doubt that summertime is the best season of the year? It reminds us all of the good ol’ days as kids, when we would have three months to frolic around carefree, hang out with our friends, and spend afternoons smooching Suzy Sanders underneath the … Continue reading

How To Endear Yourself To Howie Mandel

They say that success is when preparation and opportunity meet. But what if preparation was having a really rough morning because he stayed up all night crying and re-watching the movie Crazy, Stupid, Love? What if opportunity is being kind of a bitch for no reason? And then you end up having a When Harry Met Sally type of situation where … Continue reading

How To Talk To Your Kids About Drugs

If your kids are normal, someone will eventually offer them drugs. It will probably happen even sooner if they are extremely weird. One way or another, unless your kids work for the DEA and are bad at their jobs, someone will offer them drugs. You have most likely already had the most and 2nd most … Continue reading

How To Interact With Strangers In New York City

Almost 19 million people live in the Metro NYC area, which means that there are almost 18,999,999 potential new friends out there for you! However, this also means that you’ll have to know how to deal with the myriad people and situations you will encounter in a city filled with millions of crazy fucking human … Continue reading

How To Decide When To Take A Day Off From Work

We’ve all been there. You wake up in the morning, groggy, tired, not well rested in the slightest. And the first thought that crosses your mind is “that was a weird sex dream with Rosie O’Donnell…”. But then the second thought is always, “How the eff can I get out of work today?” The art … Continue reading

How To Use A Comma

The comma is one of the English language’s most confusing tools. I mean, is it a wrench, or a monkey? (You know? Because the monkey wrench is a tool!) If you harness it properly, the comma can skyrocket you to fame and fortune. Just ask Selena Gomez about Justin Bieber! (You know? Because Justin Bieber … Continue reading

How To Talk To Your Kids About Death

Child rearing is full of pleasant firsts: your child’s first smile, first words, first step, first date. The first time they call you “bitch” in public. First wedding, first second wedding. There are also some firsts that you might not be looking forward to, like the first time your kid asks why his skin isn’t the same color … Continue reading

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